Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize