I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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