this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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