this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
