Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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