so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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