Already got asked if we're dating
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
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