think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
