Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize
