with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
time to smoke my breakfast
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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