i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
