I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
