Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
porn star boner night. come get it.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
