yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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