I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
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please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
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She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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