You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize