When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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