my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
