The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
