I wannas sexs uuuuu
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
