what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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