the condom got lost in my hair
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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