Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
