but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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