if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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