Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I want to be your penis for a week.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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