it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
