There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
