Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
