We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
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way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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