There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
