Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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