Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
