Jerry, you need to find god
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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