where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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