Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Randomize
