Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
