every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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