i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize