how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
