So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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