Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize