He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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