i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
