that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
