please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I have grass duct taped all over my body
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize