Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
