just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
