she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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