im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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