yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
